As well as the usual pleasure derived by my family from visits by these families, it has occurred to me that - as a parent - I now view such occasions with added import. I cannot help but regard our niece and nephews in the context of my daughter's potential, and hope that she will grow up to share some of their best qualities.
Our eldest nephew is, by all accounts, very very clever. He possesses an encyclopaedic knowledge of the UK motorway network (the utility of which will, I am sure, reveal itself in due course), and effortlessly outclasses me at mental arithmetic. And I'm no numerical slouch. I value an enquiring mind very highly, and sincerely hope - with some confidence - that our daughter will show levels of intelligence even approaching his.
His brother is relaxed charm personified. This ability to remain calm under pressure means that he shows an increasing prowess at, for example Wii bowling, not to mention football. Needless to say, this is an extremely valuable quality. I have already been working hard to develop my daughter's interest in sport, and the early signs are promising. Much to her mother's chagrin, her apparent passion for watching television is at its strongest during the football. Or the cricket. Or even the rugby. And I'm not even that bothered about rugby.
Our Canadian nephew constitutes an unprecedented bundle of energy and enthusiasm. Other jaded parents who speak of their loved ones as people who "never stop" are but amateurs, yet to experience true relentlessness. Rest assured that he will drain every ounce of mischief from any building he enters. And he gets away with it all. Because he, at two years old, is a people person. He makes charmingly appropriate use of please and thank you, remembers people's names and, when all else fails, he brings out the grin. This is a grin which, in tandem with his big brown eyes, cannot be resisted. In this respect also, our daughter shows early promise. Please, thank you, and names are as yet beyond her, but the grin is coming along very nicely indeed.
Our niece, last year, underwent harrowing surgery which would be a traumatic ordeal for someone of any age, let alone under a year, as she was then. This was a very difficult time for her family, friends, and anybody who knows her. The one person who held their resolve, and kept smiling throughout was our niece herself, who made less fuss than I do when I cut my fingernails a bit too short and it's all sore for a day or two. This kind of dignified resilience is a rare quality, and one which I would be immensely proud to see in my daughter, but hopefully not in similar circumstances. Our niece also demonstrates adorable maternal instincts, which were demonstrated last week by the hugs and kisses she insisted on bestowing upon our daughter. Both young ladies seemed to enjoy this bond, as did we. Although we did have to stop her from sharing all her food with our daughter, whose digestive system isn't quite ready for such generosity.
Clearly any sane and sensible parent wants their child to develop the best possible characteristics. What is interesting is how parents determine which characteristics these are. Only from experience have I truly understood that you define the best as that which you see in those you love.
I won't sleep tonight if I don't temper this with some healthy cynicism, so I feel I should also raise the possibility that the qualities I identify in others are simply those I see in myself, in my more egotistical moments (of which there are many). But whatever the cause, the effect seems to be good, so that's ok really.
